The Five People Who Make You YOU

Alex McNeiceUncategorized

The Five People Who Make You You

We are all made up of five people.  If you can know, understand, and align these five people you will truly know yourself, and know where you are going.

So, who are the five people that make you you?

PERSON 1 – Who You Think You Are

Who do you think you are?  What words would you use to describe yourself?  What are your emotions? You characteristics?  Your special traits that make you you?

Now, you’d think this is what really matters, and that you would know who you are, but have you ever looked into……

PERSON 2 – Who Others Think You Are

The best way to find this out is to get other people to copy the above exercise and write down words and phrases that describe you.  What emotions, characteristics and identifying traits do they see in you?

You will find that they do not necessarily match what you thought when describing yourself.  SO, who is correct?  Who knows you best?  The answer is no one does.  This is where you can find……


Ah, the holy grail!  Who you really are.  You will find who you really are lies somewhere in-between the two people above.  You will know many things about yourself that others just won’t see, but at the same time you will be telling yourself things about yourself that simply you think are true, but never come out as real in the world!

Look at the descriptions above and ask the other person why they wrote something that you had written differently.  Are there things that are the same or close?  Are there things that are wildly different?  Find out what people see and why.

When you have considered both of these views, you can have a very honest discussion with yourself about who you really are, and that discovery is one of the most important you will ever make.  Knowing who you really are is the first step to finding out who you could be, and becoming that person.  CONGRATULATIONS, you know yourself much better now!

But, we are not finished yet, because you haven’t considered……

PERSON 4 – Who You Were

We are all changing all the time.  We are very different to who we were many years ago.  Growing, adapting, and learning is key to happiness.

Write a few words about who you used to be.  Choose a time period and describe that person.  Describe your thoughts, feeling, emotions as a teenager, a young adult, 5 years ago, 10 years ago, last year, whatever you choose!

Now, specifically think about two things.  

  • Firstly, are there any traits that you used to have that you are glad you no longer have?  Why don’t you have them anymore?  How did you get rid of them?  What made them change?  Knowing this might help you change more things that you’d like to change!
  • Secondly, are there any traits that you used to have that you wish you still had?  Why don’t you have them anymore?  What happened to lose them?  Why do you wish you still had them?  Do you want them back?  Knowing this can give you a springboard to dramatic change that could simply bring you more joy and happiness.

So, now you know who you are, and who you were, you can reach the promised land of…..

PERSON 5 – Who You Want To Be

As I’ve mentioned previously, growing, adapting, and learning are key to happiness.  The problem is that, without conscious thought, we let the world and other people shape who we are and who we become!  Well, NO MORE!!!!!

You are now wonderfully equipped to take your future into your own hands.  You know everything you need to know to get started.

So, who do you want to be?  Write down some traits, emotions, and feelings you’d like to have as your new normal?  Are you bringing back some lost ones from your past?  Are you stating some new ones?  Describe who you would like to be next week, or next year, or in a few years time.

Now, look at who you are now and decide which of these things has to change to reach this new you.  For each one, come up with a plan to change it.  This might be hard alone, so you might want to find someone to help, but if you choose to go for it alone, I BELIEVE IN YOU!

You have lessons from your own past to guide you.  For things you want back that you lost, you can use the reasons you have found for why you lost them to try to reverse that.  You can think of actions or events that made you lose them and try to resolve those events in your mind and find a way to feel that feeling again.

If there are thing new that you’d like to become, you have personal experience of changing things about your past that you are pleased about changing!  What lessons can you learn from yourself in making that change happen?  How can you use those lessons to either change a current personality trait, or develop a new one that you want?  Many of the answers are already within you!


So, there you have it, the five people who make you you are:

  • Who you think you are.
  • Who others think you are.
  • Who you really are.
  • Who you were.
  • Who you want to be.

Now, go and find out about your five people.  Love them.  Learn about them.  Accept them.  And use them to make person 5 – who you want to be – the best person you can be.


Believe in yourself, understand yourself, and become your best self.